One thing needful: encouragement for parents

by Gina Grove, School-based Wellness Specialist
This article is also available as a printable handout here.

Piles of laundry, endless grocery shopping and meal prep, extracurricular activities, homework, discipline dilemmas. Parenting is hard work! Even when we think we’ve figured one area out, there are 60,000+ titles on Amazon claiming there’s a better way to parent. Most parents will get discouraged in the midst of this beautifully challenging season of life. Yet there are things we can consider that help us stay focused on Christ’s promises to maintain a hopeful parenting journey.

1. You are NOT your children.

It’s easy to get caught up in thinking we are how our children show up in school, on a sport’s field, or on a stage. We can become overly invested in their behavior, grades, and performances, believing that our worth is directly tied to how well they do. Yes, we encourage excellence in our kids. But we are not our children. Each of us is a redeemed, loved, forgiven child of God. Our identity–as well as theirs–is rooted in Christ. Stop and breathe that in: you are already complete in Christ. Your kids are dearly loved by our Savior. Parent from that place of peace and grace.

2. Only one thing is truly needed.

Social media and cultural pressure push an agenda of do more, be more. Yet Jesus reminds us, “You are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one” (Luke 10:41-42a). Ensuring our children receive training and nurturing in God’s Word is the ONE thing they absolutely need to thrive in life. And it’s the one thing we need as parents. The expression “you can’t draw water from an empty well” reminds us that if our well of faith and love is deep, we’re able to offer our children what’s truly needed. Prioritizing God’s Word in our lives and our kids’ lives can give us a framework to stay encouraged as we parent.

3. Pursuing perfectionism in parenting is paralyzing.

(Say that three times fast!)

Other than our heavenly Father, there’s no such thing as a perfect parent. We mess up. We say things we need to apologize to our kids for. We’re tough when we could have been tender, and too tender when we could have set a firmer boundary. God wants us to bring our best to this task, yet we will never be perfect at it. Focus on your daily wins: the kids left the house with clothes on. Everyone ate something today. You took a breath before you spoke in frustration. They learned about Jesus at school. You prayed together at bedtime. Remember God’s promise: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9a). His perfect power in our kids’ lives works through our weaknesses. God’s got this!

4. Today is not forever.

Whatever difficulties you may face today or tomorrow as a parent, this is not forever. It’s not forever for your children. It’s not forever for you. Today may be tough, but it won’t last beyond the next 24 hours. God assures us he’s got this and encourages us to lay aside our worries when we “seek first his kingdom and his righteousness…Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:3-34). God uses our flawed efforts to join him in the process of putting our kids on the road to adulthood. And beyond that, he is so excited for the day we will all join him in heaven!

Even on the hardest days of parenting, God gently reminds us that children are a gift from him (Psalm 127:3-4), and he is with us on this journey. Releasing the burdens of social pressure, perfectionism, and worry can help us embrace the encouraging promises of our Savior. Trust him to take our imperfect efforts and work all things for the good of his faithful Christian parents and their children (Romans 8:28).

If you’re looking for practical parenting guidance, Christian Family Solutions offers an online course called Strengthening Parent-Child Connections. This self-paced online program equips you with tools to understand and strengthen your child’s attachment style, fostering deeper trust and connection.

Access the course here

We pray that this course will be a blessing to you as you strengthen your connections with the precious children God has given you!